2006-03-02 08:04
A lady noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach.Thinking he was trying to weigh less with this maneuver, she commented, "I don't think that's going to help."
"Sure it will." he said. "It's the only way I can see the numbers."
2006-03-01 08:27
Pete: "The last time I was out hunting, I stepped off a high cliff, and would you believe it, while I was falling every fool deed I'd ever done came into my mind."
Bob: "Must have been a pretty high mountain you fell from."
2006-02-28 08:29
Two Americans laid a wreath (花圈）on a comrade's grave and saw, nearby, a Japanese laying rice on the grave of a countryman. One American asked, "When do you expect your comrade to come and eat that rice?"
The Japanese replied, "When your friend comes to smell his flowers."
2006-02-23 18:35
Two ladies were hanging out together and one was depressed. "What's wrong?"
The depressed one replied, "I've been married four times and every one of my husbands has passed away..."
2006-02-23 08:51
A young man went shopping. He bought a small can of corn, a small can of tuna(金枪鱼）, a small jar of mayo（蛋黄酱）, a small lemon and a very small box of teabags. When he came to the counter the girl at the cashregister smiled at him and said...
2006-02-22 08:00
A Joe was in the hospital and it was time for lunch. He looks at his lunch and says, "I don't like chicken soup, bring something else."...
2006-02-14 08:33
Teacher had set his class an essay in "A Game of Cricket". After two minutes Simon Steel handed his paper in and was allowed to go home. His essay read: "Rain stopped play."
2006-02-08 08:29
An out-of-towner drove his car into a ditch in a desolated area. Luckily, a local farmer came to help with his big strong horse named Buddy.
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