A charming Chinese tradition associated with the Spring Festival is turning into one-upmanship. Lin Qi reports

The Spring Festival is nearly here and small red envelopes will soon be making an appearance.

For Luo Xiao, a bank employee in Hangzhou, Zhejiang province, this has always been a bitter-sweet time. While pleased to receive her substantial year-end bonus, she also knows that a large chunk of that money will go into the hong bao, or red envelopes.

This year, Luo has agreed with relatives and friends that they will limit each red envelope to a maximum of 200 yuan ($29).

"In previous years, my son received at least 500 yuan, and sometimes even 1,000 yuan, per envelope. It was a great burden, for we felt pressured to return the same value in red pockets to nephews and nieces, and friends' children," Luo says.

"Inflating these red envelopes often leads to comparisons and jealousies among children, when they return to school after the Spring Festival."

While some people feel it is better to do away with the hong bao custom, Luo disagrees saying it is part of Chinese tradition and an expression of affection.

"I've told my son that the red envelope, no matter how much money it contains, shows the giver's love and deserves his gratitude," she says.

Her concerns over the amount in these envelopes reflect those of many urban parents who worry that their only child, being brought up in a well-off family, may take it for granted that money comes easily and can be spent lavishly. More parents are starting to realize the importance of cultivating value for money in their children.

Wu Hao, a Beijing businessman, says he cherishes the childhood memory that he and his brothers have of placing their red envelopes under their pillow and dreaming of all the snacks and toys they could buy with that money.

"It is a collective memory of my generation," Wu says. "At that time, we children got little or no pocket money. We looked forward to the Spring Festival, as that's when we would get new clothes as gifts. We could keep the red envelopes - usually with just a few kuai inside - for only one night. We had to hand over all the money to our parents the next day and never saw it again."

The story of the red envelope of Wu's son is vastly different. The 13-year-old receives a monthly allowance of about 500 yuan from his father. He has his own bank account, and all money he has received in red envelopes since he was 8, has gone into it.

"He is never extravagant, but it bothered me to hear my parents telling him recently that, 'your father founded and owns the company. You will inherit it in future'," Wu says.

"I don't want my son to think there will be a huge legacy waiting for him. I tell him I will leave nothing to him. He should figure out what he is interested in and what he can do for a living," Wu says.

He took his son on a hiking trip in Qinghai province last summer. Before they set out, they shopped at an outdoor equipment store. The boy was tongue-tied when he saw the several thousands that all the outdoors gear cost.

"He enjoyed the trip, which exposed him to Qinghai's stunning landscape and the different lifestyles of the people there. He now realizes that big spending has its rewards," Wu says.

Luo, on the other hand, wants her 11-year-old son to live frugally. If the boy wants to buy something, he has to first persuade his parents and grandparents.

Luo says there was a time her son fancied online games and asked for money to buy virtual currencies. But since the boy had little time left after homework to play online games, Luo declined his request.

"I asked him to think about whether he would really spend all that virtual money, or did he just want it to show off to his classmates," she says.

Last year, following the devastating earthquake that hit Sichuan, the primary school Luo's son attends, organized a donation drive to help children in the quake-hit areas. Many students donated 400 to 1,000 yuan. Luo's son said he wanted to stand out by donating the most.

Luo says she was sad to see that students had turned even a charity effort into an opportunity to show off the family wealth. She took 400 yuan out of her son's red envelope and asked him to collect another 200 yuan by doing odd jobs. The boy sold a stack of old newspapers he had saved for a year. He also helped wash the dishes and sweep the floor, for which he was paid 10 yuan each time.

"He didn't do a thorough cleaning, but he learnt of the hardship of earning money. I told him the children in Sichuan would appreciate the efforts he had made more than the amount he donated," Luo says.

Parents of older children are increasingly encouraging them to learn about wealth management.

Pan Minghua, mother of a 17-year-old in Shenzhen, Guangdong province, had been quite satisfied with her son's spending habits, until he spent an allowance of 1,000 yuan given by his grandfather in just two weeks last year. She checked his mobile phone bill and found her son had spent a lot on calls to his girlfriend. So she started asking him to maintain daily accounts.

"He now has savings of more than 7,000 yuan. I encourage him to invest his money. He is old enough to know about stocks and wealth planning. I don't want him to become someone who spends all his money or depends on his parents, after he graduates from college," Pan says.

(China Daily 02/09/2010 page18)