Team bonding, Chinese style

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As an English Teacher, one of the perks of my job is to go on a company holiday every year. The last holiday with my current company promised it all: a summer party with barbeques, beaches and beer on a sunny island near Zhuhai, with a theme park visit thrown in. What we didn't count on was the moldy hotel rooms, stomach-churning boat rides and clueless bus drivers who ensured it wasn't an ordinary day at the office!

Adam Benson [Photo provided to chinadaily.com.cn]

In keeping with Chinese tradition, the event was extremely well organised, with our two day adventure planned down to the minute. On the day before departure, we all got text messages telling us to be there by 8.45am sharp because the bus would leave at exactly 9.00. The itinerary was pretty much shot to pieces by 9.15 as the bus showed no sign of movement and it was closer to 9.30 by the time we finally left.

Three hours later, we finally arrived at a restaurant near Zhuhai to have lunch. On the way there we took a small detour to a small seating area with a stage, where we watched some bizarre play about two teachers (unwillingly chosen from the audience) marrying some local girls. It seemed like an unnecessary distraction and the sudden downpour halfway through matched the mood of the bored, hungry audience perfectly.

After lunch, we boarded a small rusty looking boat and stepped into a cramped seating cabin with a barely working air conditioner. No one was prepared for how rough and choppy the ride would be and for thirty long minutes the boat lurched and heaved violently until everyone felt sick. Upon arrival, we climbed up a couple of small hills and into a train provided by the hotel to take us to our rooms. After many hours of travelling, we were looking forward to relaxing in our rooms before going to the beach.

Our enthusiasm faded a little when we saw our rooms however, which were absolutely filthy. The unwashed bed sheets, moldy walls, frayed electrical wires, ant infestations and wild dogs on the hotel grounds couldn't be overlooked and instead of sunning ourselves on the beach, we stood awkwardly outside our rooms while company management angrily cornered the hotel owner and demanded alternative accommodation.

The negotiations failed but we went to the beach anyway. We had some fun while swimming, playing beach Frisbee and taking beautiful sunset photos but the mood was still tense, knowing the state of the rooms we'd have to go back to. No one wanted to sleep that night so we sat on broken park benches on an upper floor balcony, talking and drinking until the small hours.

The next day looked more promising, as we finally left the island. The boat ride back was just as uncomfortable as the ride there and we were still reeling when we boarded the bus for our two hour ride to the theme park. After that time elapsed and with no sign of a theme park, the driver suddenly turned around and started driving in the opposite direction. Apparently the road ahead was closed and he had to find another route. He then surprised everyone even more by suddenly going off the highway onto a small country road littered with potholes.

For a short while, the bus jolted and bumped along as luggage flew everywhere and management asked for phones with GPS capability to help the hopeless driver. After asking some very surprised looking farmers for directions, we were finally back on the right path, arriving one and a half hours later than planned and having to withdraw from the tug of war competition. The afternoon was still fairly pleasant and uneventful as we went on the rides and enjoyed perfect swimming conditions before boarding the bus home.

On the bus, we were given a choice of going to a local restaurant for dinner or going straight home and everyone voted for the latter option. The driver had other ideas however, and after about 10 minutes, stopped outside a restaurant and demanded that we get out and eat. For a few tense minutes he refused to budge but after discussing the issue with some of our staff, finally restarted the bus and headed back to Guangzhou.

This may sound like the holiday from hell and in many ways, it was. It would have been nice if there was time for all the planned activities but I'm also glad that I had the opportunity to take part in such a big adventure and have this great story to tell. For that reason, I'm already looking forward to the next company holiday! 

The author is originally from Brisbane, Australia but have been based in Guangzhou China since August 2008. He works as an English Teacher for EF, and as a freelance writer on the side.

The opinions expressed do not represent the views of the China Daily website.

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