Break out the beer and fire up the grill. The World Cup is upon us again. After four years of waiting, you have a perfectly good excuse to wake your neighbors at three in the morning with boisterous cheers of delight ... your favored team has scored a goal. Come morning, you can stumble into work red-eyed and delusional, still blabbering nonsense about how many bad calls the referee made. No rebuke, only nods of agreement. Undoubtedly there are many upsides for it being World Cup time again.

Everywhere you look in Beijing, the Chinese are catching World Cup fever. The hype and level of excitement is surprising to me, especially since the Chinese national team is not taking part in this World Cup. But maybe it shouldn't be surprising, given the fact a large portion of the Chinese public openly mocks the misadventures of its national side that has made it to only one World Cup.

Some even go as far as referring to them as the "national pigs".

So in the absence of a national team to support, the Chinese have turned to others. By default most Chinese pick teams with a track record for winning the World Cup, such as Brazil or Germany.

"They always find a way to win. That's why I cheer for them," one of my friends told me about his support of the German team.

"The Brazilians are so talented and fun to watch," another friend said.

This World Cup, other favored teams you will find many Chinese cheering for are Spain, Argentina and England. I doubt you will be able to find any Chinese cheering for Slovenia or Paraguay; it's better to put your hopes in a winner.

However, Chinese girls choose teams for a completely different criteria - sexiness.

"I like watching the World Cup to see all the handsome players," one of my young female students told me as she stared at an old and worn picture of the Italian Francesco Totti plastered on her notebook.

For years England was the favorite choice of Chinese girls. Not because of the lanky Peter Crouch or the imposing John Terry, but rather for the biggest sex symbol the football world has ever seen David Beckham.

However, Beckham is a no show for this World Cup, which means I doubt any Chinese girl will dare lift her voice to cheer for the three lions. Sorry, Wayne Rooney, but when you take your shirt off and strike a pose, you are more likely to make Chinese girls run away from you in fear rather than drool at you in admiration.

So don't be surprised if you watch a match with a Chinese girl and she doesn't know which team she is cheering for until halftime. She needs time to survey the playing field.

So even though there is no Chinese team at the Cup, don't expect the Chinese to be apathetic. Instead they will find new teams to support.

As an American I can understand this. Inwardly I'll cheer for my country's team but outwardly I'll have to cheer for another in order to save my football face. Like my Chinese friends, I'll support a team that has a real chance of winning, let alone making it out of the first round.

As much as the World Cup might be a reminder to Chinese and Americans of their national side's lack of prowess, it is a dream come true to Beijing bars and pirated good sellers.

No doubt every bar in town will be showing matches on giant screens in an effort to please the throngs that long to see battles rage across the pitch. The nighttime starting times of these matches offer bars the chance to really rake in the cash.

Business is also booming for those selling pirated mascots and national team shirts. Taobao's online shops are brimming with World Cup products that, given their prices, are certainly not real. I mean, you can buy a Spanish shirt for 30 yuan.

No matter what team you support, there is nothing quite like yelling and screaming at the TV for a whole month; nothing quite like pinning your hopes on a group of players who don't even speak your language.

There is no doubt World Cup fever is here, so let's make the most of it.