I like massages. I find them relaxing and a great form of relief for the lower back pain I occasionally suffer from.
As every expat knows, there are literally thousands of massage places available in Beijing, from Chinese hospitals to blind clinics and of course, exotically expensive spas.
I have been to a few of each, but came out of my latest trip with a very uncomfortable feeling.
While I won't mention the name, I will note that it was a small but popular blind massage place that I had heard about online. User feedback was largely positive so I was quickly convinced it was legit and since my boyfriend also likes to unwind, we visited it together on Friday night after the end of a stressful working week.
Stepping inside we thought it looked reasonably clean and the employees were friendly. We ordered the standard medical massage, since my back was reeling from a week of laptop-induced fury, and settled in for the experience.
There is a belief in China that says it is best to get someone of the opposite sex to massage you in order to boost the idea of harmony. While I can't say I am completely convinced of the reasoning behind the theory, I found it didn't matter in this place. There were no masseuses, only masseurs, and mine was a large man, partially sighted, who seemed pleasant enough.
He also gave a pretty good massage, but it came with a nagging sensation of doubt that I couldn't quite put my finger on.
It wasn't until I got home and had a chance to vocalize my feelings with my boyfriend that I started to feel really uncomfortable - I remember the masseur had touched me inappropriately on my chest area, something that has never happened before and which obviously surprised me.
I had actually realized it at the time but couldn't be certain if it was part of the massage or not, since it was very indirect. The moment passed very quickly and once finished, I was stuck without any proof. This had stopped me doing anything at the time and it was my inaction that had made me feel like the victim - I should have stopped it immediately but I waited until it was too late.
Massage is a very private type of service - few other times in our lives do we allow strangers to touch our bodies. This means that complete trust is put in their hands of the masseur and that is a sacred power. But mine severely damaged that feeling of trust and I haven't been back since. While I can't turn back time and challenge him directly, I would like to state that more should be done to help others like me. At no point during that experience did I know what to do with my grievance.
Looking back, there was no number I could call to voice my concerns, no plaque on the wall that announced credibility, no female presence watching over the masseurs. Also, I thought that the very fact these men were blind might make them appear like the victim if challenged, which had definitely contributed to my muteness at the time.
But it shouldn't be like this. I hope that local authorities will listen to my plea and try harder to regulate this industry. Massage parlors are unique places where the borders of physical contact are broken, but they need not become places of abuse.
Why not enforce regular training, both dealing with customer skills and also the art of massage itself - damage can be done with the wrong technique? A customer helpline could easily be set up, as could a complaint box or a more discreet one online. Finally, try to send around an uncover checker now and again to make sure everything is going smoothly.
I didn't know how much it would upset me until it happened. I feel like I was taken advantage of and there was no system in place to protect me, which is not what China should be like in the 21st century. I won't go back now as my confidence is hurt - it badly needs a massage from the authorities.