However, many parents have psychological resistance against cultivating correct values in their children because they regard it as something like brainwashing and taking advantage of their children. What they don’t understand is that values are like a beacon in children’s individual development and determine the path they would choose in the future, what kind of person they would become and the way they would pursue happiness.
Therefore, when it comes to passing on values to children, parents have to fulfill their responsibility. Take Liu Tienan’s case for instance. On the question of pursuing happiness, his idea of “taking the shortcut” to success is a false value that he nurtured and passed on to his son. Contrary to Liu Tienan’s belief, educator Zhou Guoping says the first goal in life should be to become an excellent rather than a successful person. A person who excels in a field or fields, even if not successful in terms of earning money, can still live a meaningful life. In other words, a person who pursues excellence is more likely to live in harmony with others.
One of the many important characteristics of family education is that parents should teach children the important values of life on every occasion they get. But while communicating with children, parents should also discuss the problems, rather than only cramming their minds with high-sounding words and terms. More importantly, parents have to help children understand what they say.
The author is director of the family research center at the China Youth and Children Research Center.