Critics can keep you sharp

Have you ever had a colleague/co-worker who really gets under your skin? It seems that every time you have any interaction with them, they say or do something that nearly sends you through the roof? I do my best to control my emotional response and reaction to things that truly irritate me. But there are 'some people' who constantly say things in ways that definitely rub me the wrong way. I have them in my life experience. I'm sure you do as well.

The good news about critics is, they can be beneficial to you if you view them and use their criticisms in the right way. Though I am confident that their actions are not intended to help you or make things better for you, nonetheless, you can use their actions, words and criticisms to your advantage. 

First, you need to ask yourself why you get so easily irritated by these people (or this person). What is it that they bring out of you that you need to deal with? More important, what irritates you is likely something that you fear. You need to focus on what that is and do your best to sharpen your skills, ideas, knowledge or attitudes regarding it.

Make no mistake. I have no notion that your or my critics are consciously trying to make either of us better. They are not. They are often misguided people who are dealing with their own inadequacies, prejudices and insecurities. They are often controversial, obnoxious, arrogant, antagonistic and quarrelsome people. They aren't people you are likely going to 'fix'. 

The best use for these kinds of people (who are unavoidable in life) is to take their criticism and look inward at yourself. How can you use their irritations to make you better? It takes you going to a higher level of wisdom than you've likely considered in the past. It takes the acceptance that on the grander scale of things, they are in your life for a reason. It takes the full realization that they aren't doing what they're doing to make you or your life better. However, YOU can make their actions, opinions and irritations work FOR you rather than simply upset you. But, it is up to you. It starts with your perspective on their presence in your life and what you will do with this discomfort that they bring you.

The original blog is at: http://blog.chinadaily.com.cn/blog-787069-29277.html