Focus

Popular website looks to ease the pain of distance

By Du Juan (China Daily)
Updated: 2010-07-09 09:25

Zhang Xinbo says if people can overcome years apart, they know how to make their love work for their whole life. [Provided to China Daily]

Zhang Xinbo, 29, founded one of the first websites aimed at long-distance lovers when he set up www.yidilian.com.

The forum which went live in 2007 now has about 10,000 registered members.

Zhang picked March 8 as the day to launch his online endeavor because it was the day he separated from his wife one year earlier because each of them had to work in different cities.

Zhang met his wife in 2003 and then they fell in love despite the fact they were in different cities. After a three-year long-distance romance, they decided to tie the knot.

"We passed the test of distance and got married in 2006," said Zhang.

"However, we never expected that we would have to separate again after we were married."

Just a few months after they became husband and wife, Zhang's company sent him to work in Shenzhen and it was while he was alone there that he began to build his online forum dedicated to all those suffering from being parted from their lovers.

He never did any promotional work or advertising for his forum and said it was never about being a business but was simply a platform to communicate with his wife and others facing the same situation.

Today, the site is still losing money - he pays 2,000 yuan a year to rent the domain name and gets about 100 yuan a year in income.

"I am so happy to have built a place for people who are having or have had a long-distance relationship, so they can share their feelings, tell their troubles and find some help," said Zhang.

"In modern society, many people are fickle toward life and love, but you will find a lot of pure emotion in this forum."

The site includes many sections, among them are favorites such as the private blogging section and the happiness-sharing section.

At the end of last year, he added a "finding help" section for those really feeling the pain of parting.

Many members of the site have posted their problems and worries and had advice from others who have been through the same emotions.

There is an honor hall in the forum for the members who successfully survived their time apart and got back together. Right now, the honor hall has about 20 members out of the 10,000 who use the site.

Zhang admitted that the prognosis for long-distance relationships surviving is poor but says "long-distance is the test for real love".

"If people can overcome years apart, they know how to make their love work for their whole life."

Zhang said no one should let distance be a barrier to happiness.

"I believe it is unnecessary for couples to give up their relationships because of distance. The only reason I can accept for a break-up is if love doesn't exist any longer," Zhang said.

"Many people say that one of the two people in a long-distance relationship should sacrifice for the other. I don't agree. If they love each other, nothing should be called a sacrifice in the relationship."

At the end of last year, Zhang quit his job in Shenzhen and returned to the city where his wife was.

After a total of six years of long-distance love, they finally got together and Zhang began his own business.

The forum has been getting more and more popular, something he attributes to the growing number of long-distance lovers in modern society.

But, despite its success, Zhang said he will not try to make money out of the forum. He simply wants it to be a place where people can share feelings.

"Never give up because of a long distance between you," he said.

"Everyone can be with their perfect partner if they put their heart into it."