Forum

Dating topic arouses interest

(China Daily)
Updated: 2010-03-02 13:56

Editor's Note: The METRO article "Why do foreigners date Chinese women?" (Feb 26, 2010, M3) prompted more than 40 Web comments so far. We have decided to print some most representative views here.

It's the new norm

Everyone has a different reason for the many different things they do. I'm dating a Chinese girl because I met her five years ago in Beijing and she became my closest friend.

Despite what many Chinese people believe, it is possible for foreigners and Chinese to have a close, meaningful relationship. Too many times I have walked down the street with my girlfriend and someone called her a name just because she was with me. For this reason, I honestly realize how much Chinese people do not know about foreigners. Much of what Chinese know about foreigners is propoganda from other Chinese who do not know foreigners.

I suggest anyone interested in expanding their knowledge of the world to take advantage of the fact that there are more and more foreigners in China. Meet some of them. You can't meet just one and expect to know them all. Foreigners come from hundreds of different cultures and speak many different languages.

Anyone who thinks a foreign guy or girl is dating a Chinese person out of "curiosity" obviously doesn't know how globalized the world is. In fact, international and interracial marriages are the norm in many places.

Well

Sweet relationship

I happen to be a Western woman who is married to a Chinese man. I love him very much because he is kind, supportive, sweet, tall and strong. Nobody has ever told my hubbie to lay off me as if he as a Chinese man would steal a Western woman from a Western guy. In fact, nobody cares about that and many of my foreign friends in China have been very supportive of our relationship, and at worst indifferent.

The reason why many Western men date Chinese girls is because they are slim and dainty and they find them attractive. Most Chinese guys are also small and slim ... so most are not so attractive to Western women.

My partner and I are an exception.

Stephanie

Hands off our women

It is not only in China that foreign (Western) men are seen courting or marrying Chinese women. It occurs often in Western countries, too. The opposite is not the case, that is, Chinese men courting or marrying Western women.

Many times, you get Western men telling us that they have a beautiful Chinese wife. Have they seen Chinese men post that they have married a beautiful Western woman in their country? Of course not. If they did, they will get a lot of hate messages.

Westerners harbor resentment when one of their women dates or marries a Chinese man.

They have no problem if they choose to marry a Chinese woman, however. Westerners like to tell non-Westerners in their country that Chinese are there to steal their jobs and women.

Chinese men should resent Western men marrying Chinese women because of this double standard and the fact that there is a shortage of Chinese women for Chinese men to marry.

Lay off our women

Foreign girls a chore

The answer is simpler than you might imagine. There are very few foreign women here: those who come stay only a short while. They work here one year and leave. Most pampered foreign girls don't have the backbones to "rough it out" in China without their bubble baths, favorite health foods and overly soft mattresses.

Men are more likely to stay for longer periods because we don't crave all the little things available back home.

Our options are to date a foreign girl who is likely to leave at the end of the year, date a local girl, or be lonely.

Steve

A bout of jealousy

I think that the American woman who stated that foreign men date Asian women because they are portrayed as sexual objects is completely wrong. I know quite a number of men who date Chinese women and one of the main reasons is that they represent the majority of what most men want. I also know quite a few American men and they have very little interest in having a committed relationship, other than a sexual one.

American women are too aggressive and opinionated and they don't age well. As a result, American women are jealous of Asian women.

Eric Somers

Numbers dictate odds

People seem to have missed out on something extremely obvious here.

If I lived in Japan I would date a Japanese girl. Korea? Korean girl. Canada? Canadian girl. China? Chinese girl. Not out of curiosity, but because of the environment. I'm pretty sure there are probably fewer than 300 single foreign girls in my current city compared with upward of a million single native girls.

Even then, most of the girls I would consider dating are too traditional to date a foreigner. It took me weeks of persuasion before my girlfriend agreed to date me.

Carl

Splendid wife, culture

First of all, I love my beautiful Chinese wife. She is a sweet, wonderful person and she has a strong head. I (Western guy) enjoy learning the Chinese language and about Chinese food from her. I have a long way to go to understand everything about China. It doesn't matter if she is slim or not, sexy or not, as long we love each other.

Scott

Visas rule supreme

In many respects that female American teacher is correct.

The end of the article suggests that Chinese women should ask whether the Western man is her type or not. Well, of course he is, if he can get her a visa ... not to mention build her ego among her friends because she has a foreign boyfriend. These are the main reasons why many Chinese women date foreigners. I hope that answer doesn't surprise the writer too much.

Ganzhoulin

The story and comments can be accessed at chinadaily.com.cn