Expats

Expat life makes you intelligent

By Helen Zhang (China Daily)
Updated: 2010-01-28 10:54

As a Chinese overseas returnee who lived in Australia for many years, I am often put into awkward situations where I have to decide if I am Australian or Chinese. For instance during the 2008 Olympics, I could never decide which team to support.

However last week I realized I am Chinese and patriotic in fact! When catching up with an old China hand, our Australian friend Ray commented on the fact that he was "becoming Chinese". I thought after staying here for over nine years, and being married to a Beijing lady, that was no surprise. And I was expecting to hear some glowing, at least somewhat positive observations.

To my disappointment, he said that the reasons that made him feel Chinese were - he has started loudly clearing his throat and nasal passages by spitting in the street, he now always jumps queues at shops, and is even capable of elbowing old ladies away to get in a taxi instead of waiting on a sub-zero snow-riddled street for a vacant taxi!

I got upset at such a statement of what he thought being "Chinese" means! As if hearing other people criticizing my own children unfairly, it provoked an unpleasant feeling deep inside me. I became angry!

Admittedly we all see and hear many Beijingers clearing their throats and spitting on the ground - but as a Chinese friend commented "well that is not Chinese. After the Beijing Olympics we don't do it anymore".

One must also remember that China has more than 700 million farmers - many of them have just struggled their way out of poverty. Etiquette and manners are often just luxuries for those who live for survival, and those who are less educated. And some of them may have bronchial issues or smoke heavily.

As for jumping queues - the only valid reason is that there are a lot of people in China. You need to learn how to get ahead without necessarily doing the wrong thing. Often Chinese just focus on getting things done, rather than doing the polite thing.

It reminded me of my own recent "wrong doing". I went to a department store to buy an air filter to replace the old one we have at home. When I got there, a foreign lady was making some enquiries at the counter. The Chinese salesgirl saw me and gave me a smile while asking "what would you like".

The foreign lady got really angry and started to raise her voice. I hesitated for a second but decided not to try to calm her down - I resolved to stay in my "Chinese" zone!

A couple of minutes later I walked away feeling shocked about how selfish I was. For the rest of the journey home I was thinking why did I behave so badly? Time to leave Beijing perhaps?

So back to Ray's interesting dilemma. I guess you could argue: "if it is so bad living in China, why are so many foreigners still here"?

Our wonderful Chinese friends, Eric and Cat, had a brilliant answer. They read somewhere that research has found that living an expatriate life stretches our brain. It stimulates creative ideas and also makes life more interesting, as we see new images, new people and have new experiences.

I started to think maybe that's it. That is why even though like Ray, many expats living in China have those "I hate China" days, they still choose to stay here. They focus on the positives, explore Chinese history, economy and culture, while meeting many colorful characters they would not have otherwise met.

In that sense, Ray really has become Chinese!