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His face as red as an apple my Chinese colleague rose to propose a toast. "To our cooperation and future," he loudly blurted out across a table of half eaten food. As our table-mates stood he lifted his glass and shouted, "Ganbei!" The baijiu burned as it rushed down my throat.
When I sat down the same Chinese colleague turned to me and said, "Now that we are happy drinking together we will leave this table as good friends."
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"Chihao, hehao" (eat good, drink good) as the Chinese say. In a more official setting when you are invited to a banquet with your Chinese colleagues or business contacts, you are expected to drink.
If a toast is offered you it is rude to refuse it.
Most of the time this aspect of Chinese culture is warm and inviting. Sometimes it gets completely out of hand.
In the last month alone newspapers have run stories about officials, businessmen, and even police dying from alcohol poisoning after drinking too much at lavish banquets or business dinners.
I have been to many such banquets and experienced this ganbei culture myself.
At these dinners there are often several round tables where the guests sit.
One time, at such a dinner, a Chinese friend next to me and explained, "There is a whole strategy to drinking."
I was intrigued and asked him to explain more.
"When you toast other tables, try to toast the whole table at once, and when someone comes to toast our table, we must make them toast us one at a time."
It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know what will happen if you end up seeing the bottom of your baijiu cup 10 times in 10 minutes.
If you want proof then just go to any nice restaurant in Beijing where such banquets are held. Wait till about 9 pm and then take a trip to the bathroom.
You are sure to be met by foul smelling and largely baijiu based deposits in each stall.
Usually one of the culprits will still remain, staggering near the sink, insisting to his worried colleagues that everything is fine.
But as you catch a glance of his watery eyes, it's obvious he would rather be somewhere else.
No one likes vomiting in some dank, dirty bathroom while their friends enjoy delicious food. Come to think of it, no one likes dying from alcohol poisoning. So the question begs to be asked: Why does ganbei culture remain so popular?
"Drinking is how you make contacts and even seal deals," a Chinese professor told me.
"Refusing a toast will make me lose face and show disrespect. That's not how to build relationships."
It seems many Chinese are stuck between their common sense and the unspoken rules of ganbei culture.
But surely some of the recent actions of police departments and officials to honor the causalities of ganbei culture with words like "he died in the line of duty" and "martyr" will only make matters worse.
So if you find yourself sitting at a banquet where the alcohol is flowing, it would be a wise choice to insist on beer instead of baijiu. That way you can leave the dinner with your reputation, food, and life all intact.
To all my Chinese friends out there... please ease up on your offers of "ganbei"... killing me does not make me happy.